


We Fall Together

by wholocked_Pinkie_in_theImpala



Series: The AU No One Needed [2]
Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Gen, Me? Projecting on the boys?, One Shot, Protective Ryan, Shy Shane, Social Anxiety, for the plot, lets pretend school starts in september, more likely than you think, shyan if you squint
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-22
Updated: 2018-01-22
Packaged: 2019-03-08 02:40:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13448790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wholocked_Pinkie_in_theImpala/pseuds/wholocked_Pinkie_in_theImpala
Summary: Before the Dorothy and Delaney House, before the Unsolved channel, and even before the questions of ghosts and demons, there was freshman year. There was Ryan Bergara and Shane Madej. The geek that stayed out of the limelight and the weirdo from Illinois.





	We Fall Together

**Author's Note:**

> I can't believe I'm continuing to write BFU fanfic. What is my life?

 Ryan wasn’t expecting high school to be this intimidating. It somehow felt like everyone but him got older and wiser over the summer. He still felt like a little kid, forever stuck in the mindset of an eight-year-old. High school was a place for those ready to get older. Ryan didn’t think growing up was the thing for him quite yet.

The first day was smooth. A lot of familiar faces showed up -- people he’s seen since elementary school. It was safe to say he knew the names of almost everyone in all of his classes. He wasn’t necessarily close to any of them (he had very few close friends) but it was a little comforting to know that he didn’t have to be alone in any of his classes. A lucky bonus of being a people-person.

When the last class of the day rolled around, he happened to be the first student in the room. He acknowledged his teacher with a pleasant smile and sat somewhere near the back corner. It wasn’t like he planned to do anything devious, he just thought corners were cozy. Something about being in the back was rather comforting. Perhaps it was the idea that no one would look back at him. He was safe from wandering eyes and free to eavesdrop as he pleased. It was surprising how much you could pick up from the back of a room.

Ryan snapped out of his thoughtful haze when he noticed someone take the seat next to him. A few students had trickled into the room at this point with many avoiding to sit next to strangers in favor of their friends. But this was a face Ryan didn’t recognize. He knew it couldn’t have been an upperclassman since this was a class specific to freshman. So who was this kid? Ryan was tempted to strike up a conversation, but felt like that would be too awkward. The way this boy held himself -- or rather, _didn’t_ hold himself -- made Ryan think he sat back here to avoid conversation.

If Ryan wanted to talk he would have to wait for a moment to occur naturally -- if it ever did.

An opportunity didn’t arise until almost two weeks later. It was more of an accident, really. Ryan was in the middle of a daydream and sent his pen flying when he moved his hand. He had forgotten that he picked it up. It bounced off the mysterious kid’s desk and onto the other side of the aisle. The kid -- Sean? Something with an S -- turned to Ryan in bewilderment, making Ryan smile sheepishly.

“Sorry,” he whispered. He felt like an idiot. “Can you get that for me?”

The kid -- S, S, S -- reached down and grabbed the pen and handed it to Ryan without a second glance.

“Thanks.” Ryan tried to smile at him but noticed that he was looking down at his paper. Maybe he was a little shy?

Sean(?) hummed in reply.

A bit strange, for sure, but Ryan wasn’t one to judge. He used to be very shy when he was younger -- could barely talk to people -- perhaps that’s what was happening here. A lot of people had a hard time coming out of their shell. Ryan was willing to help Sean(?) be more open if Sean(?) wanted it. He wasn’t just going to insert himself into someone else’s life like that. That would be rude. People were allowed to be shy if they wanted to be.

The bell sliced through Ryan’s ideas like an awful cheese grater. People around him tossed their things in their backpacks and left. A few students took their time to put things away neatly before leaving. The kid beside Ryan was clearly in the former category; he was one of the first students to stand up. It seemed in his haste he left a pen behind. Normally, Ryan wouldn’t bother with things that people left in places, but this pen was fancy. Not something that someone could just replace at the dollar store.

Feeling a sense of duty, Ryan shoved his notebook and pen into his backpack. He would have to organize that later. He grabbed the expensive-looking pen and headed out the door. He looked around for a second before he saw who he was looking for; his head was down and he appeared to be in a hurry to leave.

“Hey!” Ryan called out. A few people looked in his direction, but not the one he wanted. He sighed in annoyance. If only he wasn’t shitty at names.

Ryan rushed down the hall, apologizing to anyone he happened to bump into until he reached the person he needed. He put a hand on his shoulder to stop his progress. The other boy jumped and turned to face Ryan.

“You forgot this,” Ryan breathed out. He held out the pen.

The boy’s eyes lit up. He grabbed it and shoved it into his pocket. “Thanks,” he mumbled. He looked like he was about to walk away to avoid further interaction.

“I guess that means we’re even.” Ryan beamed. There was no way he was letting this guy get away without at least knowing his name.

The boy looked confused. “W-what do you mean?”

“You got me my pen and I got you yours.”

The boy toed at the ground. “I guess so…” He looked down at his feet. “At least my pen didn’t go flying past your face.”

His voice was little more than a murmur, but Ryan caught what was said. He smiled more out of embarrassment than anything. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to hit you. It just kind of flew out of my hand. But I can’t say it won’t happen again.”

The boy’s pale face flushed red. He stopped his fidgeting and looked up at Ryan. “Y-you heard me?”

Ryan quirked a brow. “Yeah, I’m not exactly deaf, y’know.”

“S-sorry,” he didn’t look Ryan in the eye and he played with the hem of his shirt. “It’s just that no one ever tries to hear me so I-I thought maybe you would be the same.” He somehow got more red. “Ah, I-I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I-I just -- I d-didn’t mean -- I don’t --”

“Hey, it’s fine.” Ryan was mildly concerned at how flustered this kid just got, but that was another worry for another time. Right now he needed to defuse this panic box before it blew itself into a whirlwind of self-doubt. “I’m a little over observant.” He stuck his hand out. “I’m Ryan.”

The boy glanced at Ryan’s hand before slowly -- like a baby deer -- put his hand in Ryan’s. “Sh-Shane.”

_Shane!_ He knew it started with an S. Ryan grinned and placed his hands on his backpack straps. “Nice to meet you, Shane. I think it’s safe to say that it doesn’t matter how softly you speak around me -- I’ll most likely hear you a hundred percent of the time.”

Shane gave a tiny smile. It made Ryan proud to be the cause of that; the first smile he’s ever seen out of Shane. For some reason, it felt special. Like maybe this kid has more potential than he’s shown. And maybe Ryan could have everyone else see that.

“Anyway,” Ryan pulled himself away from his thoughts. “I’d love to stay and chat, but I think we both have places to be. I’ll see you around?”

Shane appeared dumbfounded. “Uh, y-yeah, sure.” He gave an uneasy smile. “See you around.”

Ryan didn’t give much thought to Shane after that. In fact, it wasn’t until the last period the next day that Ryan even remembered having a conversation with him. It seemed a little rude to forget something like that, but to be quite honest, Ryan was a bit of a social butterfly. He had several conversations a day with different people. They all melded together at some point.

Shane seemed to remember it, though, because when he saw Ryan he gave him a little smile. It was faint and almost nonexistent, but it was obvious to Ryan. Shane always wore a stoic expression, so seeing anything -- even a slight difference -- was equivalent to a lighthouse in the dark.

It shocked Ryan until he recalled the day before. How could he forget that? It had been an interaction he waited for for so long. “Try not to forget your pen in your rush out of here,” he mentioned as Shane sat down.

“Maybe. If you don’t fling your pen at me again.” Shane’s voice was still quieter than average, but it wasn’t a low rumble like yesterday. That seemed like progress.

Ryan scoffed. “I wasn’t trying to throw it at you, your big head just got in the way -- it has its own gravitational pull.”

Shane smirked and Ryan felt accomplished.

Days passed and Ryan and Shane only got closer. They talked every day in class -- the only time they ever saw each other. Ryan always had to be the one to initiate conversation, but he didn’t mind. He only ever did it if Shane greeted him with a smile; it was a surefire way to know that their talk wouldn’t be forced. Shane was starting to seem more willing to talk with each passing conversation, anyway. His voice was still quiet and reserved, but it was louder than when he talked to anyone else. And he never talked to anyone else unless it was absolutely necessary.

He still had moments where he would freak out about saying the wrong thing, but Ryan would always say that it was nothing to worry about. It never was. They tended to be funny insults or comments so Ryan didn’t quite understand how Shane thought it wouldn’t be right to say them. It was possible that he just didn’t want to come off as rude.

Regardless, Ryan felt like he was helping Shane to come out of his shell. Even if it only seemed to be for him, it was better than being for nobody. Ryan knows it isn’t the best feeling when you see other people converse so easily without a sign of struggle, so he’s glad he can help Shane. If only a little.

The first time Ryan ever saw Shane outside of class was on his walk home. He had to stay about a half hour after school had ended to help out a friend. That lead to him not having a ride, so, not wanting to bother his friend who lived in the opposite direction, he walked home. It wasn’t far to an absurd degree, but it was in no way close. At least the walk would be pleasant.

He had never actually walked home before. What would be the point? His mother would always come during her late lunch break to pick him up. She would go back to work soon after she dropped him off. Ryan wondered if it was a hassle to pick him up every afternoon. He was taking time out of her lunch to do something he was doing right now. Maybe it would be easier if he started walking home. That would be a conversation for later, no doubt.

As Ryan walked, he let his mind wander to random strings of things. He was a bit of a daydreamer. In the sixth grade, he once spent the whole day in a daydream. He didn’t realize the day had slipped by him until it was time to go home. He remembered it being weird. His body was on autopilot, doing the things it would normally be doing on any given school day, only without Ryan’s knowledge. It hadn’t happened since, but Ryan still had moments where he would daydream for up to a solid hour. Was that concerning? Did other people daydream like this? He would have to --

“Shane?”

Ryan stopped in front of a house. It was a house he passed a dozen times to get home. He had just never seen Shane sitting in front of it.

Shane perked up from what looked like dejected misery at the sound of Ryan’s voice. His surprise turned into something Ryan couldn’t quite figure out. Embarrassment, perhaps. He just stared at Ryan with wide eyes.

“What are you doing out here?” Initiate the conversation. Always.

“I live here,” Shane mumbled. It was so quiet, Ryan almost didn’t hear him. He didn’t say anything else and he didn’t look at Ryan. He played with the sleeves on his jacket like a little kid who had been caught doing something bad.

“Why are you just sitting outside?” Ryan noticed for the first time the scarf Shane was wearing. He realized, after a moment of brilliance, that Shane had been wearing the scarf since day one.

“I… lost my house key.” This time it was a faint whisper to Ryan’s ears. Shane shrunk deeper into his scarf.

The only reason Ryan noticed the scarf was because Shane was hiding behind it. It was fashioned in such a way that Shane could hide his mouth behind it if he wanted to. And he was. And he had been the first time Ryan ever talked to him. “You’re just waiting here?”

Shane looked up, but only with his eyes. “What else would I do?”

Ryan shrugged. “Go to a relative’s house? A friend’s?” The scarf was old, by the look of it. It was a deep, navy blue. It must have been worn many times.

“I don’t have any relatives around here. I… I’m not from here.” He turned his eyes away. He mumbled something about friends, but -- for the first time ever -- it was too quiet for Ryan to hear.

Ryan stopped himself from questioning Shane about that. Instead, he asked, “Not from around here? Where’re you from?” There was sentimental value to the scarf. There had to be. There was some reason he had been wearing it every day. California was never cold enough to wear scarves in succession. Once in a while, maybe, but never for days straight.

Shane seemed to hesitate. “Chicago.”

That explained why Ryan had never seen him before. “Huh.” It snowed there, right? Maybe that’s why he had it.

“W-what?” Shane looked alarmed. He moved so that the part of his face that was previously hidden became exposed.

Ryan noticed that genuine fear crossed Shane’s face. Fuck. “Nothing.” It probably seemed like Ryan was disinterested or even being threatening. “I mean, that’s cool. I’ve never been there.” Smooth. Nice recovery, Bergara.

Shane retreated back into his turtle-like hideout. “It’s alright, I guess,” he murmured, sounding a little defeated.

No, the scarf wasn’t for Chicago alone. It looked too thin. Ryan shook his head a bit. The scarf wasn’t important. But he found that he couldn’t let it go. “Would you like to come over to my house until your parents come home?” An emotional time bomb like Shane needed a coping mechanism -- a way to feel safe.

Shane’s eyes widened again. “W-what? I-I…” He shrunk to the point where only his nose was seen over the scarf. “I wouldn’t want to intrude. I-I mean, your parents -- n-not that they might not be cool, b-because they might, I don’t know -- I just meant… would they be okay with it?” Before Ryan could open his mouth, Shane continued, “N-never mind. I don’t wanna know. I-I don’t want to force myself over.” His voice became quieter and quieter until it was a dull mutter that Ryan could no longer hear.

For Ryan, it used to be a smooth rock that he found. He used to keep it in his pocket at all times. Now, it sits on a shelf in his room. He still plays with it sometimes when he’s feeling anxious. “Shane.” This scarf was Shane’s rock. “I’m the one that invited you.”

Ryan could see the tops of Shane’s cheeks turn pink. “Oh.”

Ryan’s mother didn’t even ask how Shane lost his key in the first place. But he would always be welcome.

Fall would be beginning to shift into winter soon. By California standards, that meant there was a higher chance at seventy-degree weather. The two boys had gotten closer during the time fall was deciding to end. They started talking outside of class, walked home together, and Ryan even invited Shane to hang out with him and his friends during lunch. Shane didn’t feel he was quite ready for that yet, but that was okay. He was still leaps ahead of where he once was.

“Do you think I’m weird?” The question had caught Ryan off guard. They were walking together after school, as had become routine. Most of the time they had idle chat that lapsed into bouts of comfortable silence. Shane decided to break the silence with this. Ryan never knew a quiet voice could sound so loud.

In a normal situation, Ryan would say that being normal is lame. Weird is awesome. But he knew what Shane meant. It was a loaded question -- personal. Shane was too socially awkward to think of being weird as cool. Then Ryan realized with a start that this was Shane’s first time initiating a conversation. There must have been something poetic in that. “I think you’re awesome -- and a pain in the ass.” A wisp of laughter escaped Shane “Did someone say you were weird?”

Shane didn’t say anything, just tucked himself into his scarf and looked at the ground.

“Shane?” In the previous weeks, Ryan had begun to recognize when Shane was cutting himself off from the world. If Ryan didn’t stop him before it happened, any further interaction would leave him a flustered, stuttering mess. “Ghosts are real.”

“They are not.” Shane popped out of his cocoon to pout at Ryan.

Ryan let himself smile a bit. When in doubt, mention ghosts. “Whatever you say, man. Now can you answer my question?”

Shane frowned and turned his head away. “No one called me that to my face. I just… heard.”

“From who?” If anyone knew Shane they would realize he’s a nice kid with (possible) social anxiety to a crippling degree. There was nothing wrong with that.

Shane shrugged. “I dunno. I overheard people talking about me -- you know how easy it is to eavesdrop.”

Ryan knew exactly how easy it was. “What did they say?”

Shane’s face twisted into an emotion Ryan had never seen before. Was it agony? Remorse? “They just… said things. They called me weird because I don’t talk to anyone. They made fun of h-how many times I had to repeat myself t-to the teacher because he c-couldn’t hear me.” Shane screwed his mouth shut when his stutter started coming in. He continued after a moment, “They were calling me names ‘cause of how reclusive I am. They l-laughed when I s-stuttered on my a-apology b-because I ran into th-them. I-I heard them a-after I walked a-away.” He looked frustrated -- like he couldn’t believe they were right. Because he couldn’t stop stuttering.

Ryan wasn’t sure what to say. He didn’t want to think that people talked about Shane behind his back. Who would ever want to do that? He was just a quiet boy who kept to himself. There wasn’t anything wrong with that -- there wasn’t anything weird about it. He knew his tiny school jumped at the slightest bit of drama or action but making fun of someone’s stutter? That was unforgivable.

“I-I’ll --” Shane squeezed his eyes shut. He let out a pensive sigh through his nose. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” Every word was said with over articulation -- each syllable a purposeful staccato. He was focusing so he wouldn’t stutter.

Ryan didn’t even realize they were in front of Shane’s house already. “Shane, wait.” He grabbed onto Shane’s arm. Shane looked back at him in surprise, but he didn’t care. He couldn’t let Shane be alone right now. Not after the words that were said. “Do you want me to stay with you? Or you could come over to my house. It just kind of seems like you need a friend.”

Shane and Ryan studied each other for a moment. One with a worried gaze and the other with confusion. “We’re having pizza for dinner,” Shane said in a low voice.

The incident never came up again. Ryan would often catch Shane sighing in aggravation whenever his stutter appeared. He said his words in a slow, purposeful rhythm in order to get them across without the dips of his stutter. It was hard to watch Shane descend into this almost madness. He was “fixing” himself in all the wrong ways for all the wrong reasons. He started talking above mutters and whispers but it was obvious that it was uncomfortable and foreign to him. Ryan wanted to tell him to stop -- that he didn’t need to rewrite himself just because some random people thought his quirks were weird -- but he could never find the right way to say it. Maybe there wouldn’t ever be a right way.

On no day in particular, Ryan blew up. He was tired, worried, and annoyed. He was only tired because he kept staying up thinking about how to stop Shane from changing in unhealthy ways. He was worried about his friend; there was nothing wrong with him, yet he treated himself like a twisted person who needed to be rightened. It wasn’t okay.

The annoying people behind him weren’t making his day any better.

They were gossiping in not so hushed tones about anyone and everyone. Ryan heard his name come up once. They called him the “cute dork” who seemed to be good at everything he did, yet refused to take his spot on the “popular throne”. Whatever the fuck that meant. They thought of him as too humble. As if that was a bad thing. He rolled his eyes and tried to tune them out.

They mentioned names Ryan knew, but none got a reaction out of him like Shane’s did. As soon as Shane’s name came out one of their stupid mouths, Ryan sat back in his seat a bit to listen closer. He still found it hard to think that people thought ill of Shane. Shane never drew attention to him or stuck out from the crowd. That would mean that no one would even take a second glance at him. But here they were. Talking about him.

“I bet he has some secrets to hide.”

“He probably killed someone.”

“I could see that. He’s from out of state, isn’t he? Maybe he came to California to hide.”

“It’s always the quiet ones you have to watch out for -- don’t know what they’ll do.”

“And he talks to no one! Maybe he’s a serial killer. Those kinds of people always stay away from crowds.”

“I don’t think I’d go that far, but I won’t throw it out as a possibility.”

“Do you see that scarf that he always wears? How weird is that?”

“I know! It’s not even that cold. He probably uses it so people don’t recognize him. He’s always hiding behind it, anyway.”

“Someone should burn that thing.”

That’s when Ryan lost it. Accusing Shane of being a murderer? That was one thing, but threatening the one coping mechanism that helped Shane to function at all? That was inexcusable. If Shane heard them say that he would have gotten rid of the scarf immediately.

Ryan spun around, not caring about the attention this might cause, and slammed his hands down on the desk behind him. “You shut your mouths right now,” he hissed. “Shane is an amazing person, and if either of you two cared to know him, you would see that. He’s never done anything to deserve your scrutiny so you should be ashamed.” His voice turned sharp and threatening. “If I ever hear _anyone_ say these things about Shane again, I will come back to you guys and make you wish you never even learned to speak. Do you understand me?”

The two nodded with wide eyes. They didn’t speak for the rest of class.

Later that day, Ryan hugged Shane for the first time and told him he didn’t have to change for anyone. Shane was shocked, to say the least, but seemed relieved. Maybe he needed someone to tell him he could stay the same. His old, stuttering self was perfect the way he was.

It didn’t matter that rumors of Ryan started floating around. It really didn’t. Because they weren’t about Shane. They would never be about Shane.

* * *

“Ryan.”

Ryan snapped out of his thoughts to look at Shane. He moved his hand, sending the pen he was holding flying toward his best friend. He blinked. That was a bit of deja vu. “Sorry. I was thinking about something.”

Shane rolled his eyes. “I can tell.” He picked up the red pen off the bed and looked at it. Then looked down at Ryan. “I asked if you had anything in mind for the new video. Because I had an idea if you wanted to use it.”

Ryan looked at Shane for a moment. It was hard to believe they were the same size freshman year. Even sitting on the bed, Shane was a head taller than Ryan. But, to be fair, the bed wasn’t close to the ground. “I kinda had something... but thinking ahead never hurt anyone. What did you have in mind?”

Shane grinned. He’s come a long way from the awkward boy Ryan met five years ago. There were no more excessive stutters, no more quiet whispers. He was comfortable with himself. Sure, the stuttering came back when he was nervous, but now that was few and far between. Shane made himself into his own person.

He handed the pen over to Ryan.

**Author's Note:**

> If you see any mistakes, feel free to correct me! Also, tell me what you think :)


End file.
